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Writer's pictureRiley

Eat, pray, gloves: a Coronavirus survival guide. Day 1, Apocolypse

Updated: Mar 28, 2020

The sun rises on a barren wasteland. The streets are empty, no cars entertaining the repetitive switching of the street lights. No one knows the year – no one cares.


It's morning. The first, quarantined morning. What should have been "their year" has been overrun by a virus that's taken over the minds of everyone who hears about it. 2k20 is now the year of m-m-m-my corona.


It's begun.


Welcome, my fellow Apocolypsers. We are gathered here today to discuss the only thing anyone can discuss – Coronavirus. Covid-19. The vid, as the cool kids are calling it.


If you somehow live under a fucking rock, Covid-19 is a type of Coronavirus (Coronavirus being the overarching term for the illness) that has been infecting thousands of people, on every continent, on the globe. In short – it's a contagious, respiratory illness that needs to go away... like... now. Please.

Yesterday my employer told all employees we will be working from home for the foreseeable future, to help stop the spread of the Covid-19 virus.


This news came after two Utah Jazz players (one beloved and one nasty ass, mic touching, butthead) tested positive, school districts closed and notified students to stay home, and our confirmed cases almost tripled within 48 hours. We got Corona'd and we got Corona'd hard.


I plan on living to tell the tale and what better way to document this experience then drag all of you guys along with me. If we're gonna be stuck inside, you might as well lose brain cells reading my mind-numbing material, huh? Come along for the journey.

So, with this being the new norm, today marks the first day of self-quarantine. And I spent it in a panic, I'm not gonna lie to you.


A few weeks ago, I thought it would be a good idea to prepare a little bit. This whole thing had just started ramping up, news stories of toilet paper being sold out started rolling in, and I was like "Okay, probably couldn't hurt to grab a few things, no big deal. Might need like a week or two worth of items."


Fast forward to yesterday and more stories of grocery stores, convenience stores, and even hardware stores being sold out of items begin to make headlines. Flour, rice, water, toilet paper, hand sanitizer, cleaning supplies, medicine. You name it, it's sold out.


And I shit a brick.


See, I've been worried about this whole virus thing for a few weeks – making sure I kept up to date on what to expect and washing my hands as often as I could – but I was trying not to be worried worried. And then aaaallll of a sudden everything blew up in a matter of hours and I started to feel like maybe I'd missed something. Should I have worried more? So I turned to my boyfriend and said "tomorrow, we need to go shopping."


We started our day at the Chinatown Supermarket in Salt Lake. It was empty when we got there and the first thing we saw was rice, so it felt like the rice spot to be (up top ✋🏻).

We walked around trying to focus on getting the essentials and failing to ignore the snacks and I started noticing more and more people coming into the store. By the time we left the check out lines started to grow and I could feel the energy tensing.

Compared to the photos and stories I've seen about local Walmarts and Smiths, this line was a piece of cake. We waited for about 15 minutes and then had to go to Smiths to find a few more items. This is when it truly got nutty and my panic actually started to set in

Most of this experience was spent around flustered employees trying to keep up with the demand of customers. They were doing their best to stock the shelves and direct customers to items but you could see on their faces it had already been a very, very long day. We got our items and left, all while making sure not to touch our faces and applying hand sanitizer when we could.

While we were driving home, I broke down.


Overall, the stress had become too much. We spent money we weren't planning on spending, prepping for time we weren't planning on spending at home. But what truly got to me was the number of elderly people trying to navigate their way through the crowds. There really was nothing left of a lot of items one would consider "important" and if I (a relatively healthy, young adult) was worried about getting sick, I can't imagine what they were feeling.


My new momma hormones hit hard and I was in tears because... well, I was scared.


I was sad.


I was overwhelmed.


Our food haul is filled with essentials, to keep us healthy, and non-essentials, to keep us sane. And because there’s a lot of shaming going around for people hoardings goods, I’d like to say these were stocked up over the course of weeks. We didn’t buy all of your beans and rice and we didn’t even touch the toilet paper, so don’t come at me.


Essentials:

Vital wheat gluten (to make seitan – a form of vegan protein)

Pasta

Ramen noodles

Rice

Tomato sauce

Diced tomatoes

Black beans (canned and dried)

Pinto beans (canned and dried)

Kidney beans

Refried beans

Almond milk

Dried mushrooms

Tortillas

Bread

Frozen vegetables

Dog food

Cat food

Garlic

Corn starch

Bottled water

Flour

Baking powder

Coconut milk

Curry powder


Non-essentials:

Diet coke (an essential in my eyes, but for the sake of organization... and true survival... a non-essential)

Mtn. Dew

Dr. Pepper

Spring rolls

Soft pretzels

Rice crackers

Green onion pancakes

Plant-based take and bake cookies

We came home, scrubbed our hands, took showers to get the sick off us, made noodles, and then we started our quarantined lives.

In the end, we got what we needed. We spent the rest of the day working and decently prepared. But my heart still hurts. And I'm still scared.


As we spend the rest of this time self-quarantined, I'd like to share my thoughts and feelings, along with some recipes made with a whole lot of survival food. I hope we can keep each other entertained and laughing.


Eat, pray, (wear) gloves mother fuckers. Catch ya on the flip side with more stuck inside content.

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